I have been in a hit or miss with my writing. Returning from a 3 months on the road which I am calling a long vision quest I am clearer and hopefully more open to reach in and pull out information to write about. In the past I would sit down to write then an aspect of me would shut off and shut down in an act of protection: “what should not be told or shared ever”! I would face a catatonic state for several days then attempt to try again. Then for a long time I just stayed with writing about reality which includes nutrition, farming and some very basic shamanism experiences that I could easily write about. I want that is my goal is to write about it all and everything in between.
For a very long time my internal life has been like a home of a hoarder. My experiences, knowledge and information was held hostage in the depths of the rooms, covered by layers of garbage that kept the jewels hidden. Through the last 3 months I have purged much of the debris away and the fear, shame, and insecurity about myself, my journey and my life’s work. I am going to attempt to start writing about such things that do not fit the main stream systems that have happened to me. You as the reader may taken them or leave them, if by chance they awaken something inside of you and give courage to keep going fully aware and awake.
There were so many deep seated issues that came to head, long term fear systems from the experience in which I am going to be discussing here today. I think so many of us face this and it creates a “why try” attitude because nothing you do, throw at, change…………seems to work against abduction by forces that are not from this planet. It leaves a residue all over waking life, daily life situations and leaves us overwhelming with an underground, under our skin fear, constant fear and personal insecurity and huge confusion about how to live daily life.
This is what I found when I finally came to blows with my last abduction by the ET’s I call the grays. That it had contaminated any ability to be free, powerful and happy. That somewhere sometime “they” were going to take me, harm me, kill me, scare the poop out of me and there was nothing I could do about it. I could never seem to put my finger on it of what my issues really were because of the imbedded nature of the conflict of abduction in my emotional body from the first days of my life on earth when it all began. It meant that I could never trust anyone bottom line, that I was on my own. No one can save you from abduction and everyone lies about it. Our whole systems lie about this very significant issue about abduction and ET’s. We end up damaging ourselves, breaking ourselves to form ourselves into a reality that there are NO ET”S experimenting on us or other people. If your system lies about this one thing, can you stop and imagine that they are lying about everything? Which make our lives, our experiences completely and totally invalid in the world we live and we are seen as crazy, drugged by main stream and most of us sub come to suicide in attempt to finally be free from the abusive, forced medical experiments in which we have by bad ET’s for most of our lives over and over.
When I was young I had experiences with many ET”S. Some were very good and some very bad. The good ones taught me about the nature of reality, our true abilities and flew me to other worlds. The last time the “good” ET’s visited me was when I was 23. I was living in a small one room dwelling with a loft. The loft was just big enough to put a camping mat on with bedding, size of a kids single bed in width and about 15 feet long. The loft was only for sleeping, no room for anything else. At the bottom of this loft area, at the foot was a window that opened by pulling it from the top towards you. It was a medium size window. I remember opening the window that night, it was a warm summer’s night and it was a very quiet night.
I fell into a deep sleep. I was awakened laying face down flat with my arms out stretched looking at a landscape we were flying over. The bottom of this craft was like glass, see through. I could not stand up against the forces so I just laid there looking down over this world a red planet we were flying over. I kept saying: this is not earth; this is not earth over and over. I was with the good ET’s and I was so excited! The good ET”s have a love for us, our expansion of consciousness, mind you, it reflects on their consciousness as well. They are our family members which may be hard to swallow for some. When first nation people talk about the ancestors from the sky they are talking about their families of origin which are the Star Nations or what we call ET’s.
When the trip was over they gently put back on my loft bed. I was sitting up and the window at my feett was a big screen of light with no edges slowly it collapsed back into the window at my feet. I felt safe and alive, I rolled over and went back to sleep. This was my last visit from my family of origin. If I had only known it was the last time I would have great’ly thanked them for what they have done for me, but we do not know when the end comes and makes it vital we live presently in the now fully living each experience.
I have spent most of my life working on remedies to prevent the “bad” ET abductions. Immersed myself in every culture, religion and spiritual path to halt and stop it. I always return back to my path with shamanism and it is through a rigorous shamanic path that I after years had finally stopped the nightly assaults on me. The types of shamanism practices that I have used and developed will not be in the discussion here. However in the future I hope to write about such things. One particular practice that has taken me years to harness is what the topic of “The Art of Dreaming” goes into. Used in conjunction with several generating power techniques helped me reach the level needed to not be “hypnotize” by another any longer even the “bad ET”S”. I currently teach generating power workshops as well as consult with people or life couching in the arts, work and practice of shamanism. I do groups and private sessions, in person and by Skype video call by appointments. I do charge and can adjust it accordingly. These days it is how I make my living.
I am working on getting a tele-seminar of workshops going but I have been really forced into clearing my own slate this year 2014. I was asked by spirit to start doing road trips to teach and bring my work to places that it is needed. In the process I found myself on road trip personal vision quests clearing huge amount of blocks in myself, reclaiming energy and getting my ducks together in a row as I evolve into what spirit had in mind for me.
I want you to know that there are” good” ET”s which are our families members from before we came here and “bad” that do I feel mean harm, in some cases great harm. As I journey down the road of life everything that I participate in is always about freedom to choose, freewill of some sort and for me the events that I have suffered through with the bad ET’s have left me NO know options or choices against their agendas and what seems to be a scientific study. I thoroughly believe in like attracts like and we do this same kind of process to animals against their wills for science. Maybe it is a matter of that we get what we give? Could it be as simple of stopping the experimenting on animals, then the experimenting on us will stop? I have considered many lines of thought in regards to my experiences with the bad ET”S and all I know is that for me as a person, a spirit out of freewill and my freedom to choose. I do not want to participate with being abducted without being asked while I am in an awaken state. I know that my answer would be something along the lines of “fuk you” and I am unwilling to be involved with it on any level, I wish you a nice day.
Who in their right mind would become a scientific experiment? No one that is why in our history the nazi scientist did the same kinds of tests and experiments that the ET”S do on us to the Jewish people who were in prison and could not opt out. There are times I do believe that maybe the stories about this being a prison planet are true, but at some point you awaken through a process of spiritual work in my case shamanism, the varieties that extend back 10,000 years or more and you begin to learn how to control your experience and fully opt out even if it comes to violence. That leads us into the last abduction I had, where my work in the night dreaming world and generating of power finally paid off!
Around the middle of December in 2013, I was in the condo alone; my roommate was out of town for a long duration. It had been a very long time since the last time I was abducted and I had felt this way due to the shamanic work I was doing. I went to bed early that night.
I woke up, I felt myself being pulled off my bed on top the floor. I was then being dragged down the hall hovering in the air in my comforter. Though this situation happened rapidly a matter of seconds I was fully aware in my dreaming body. The fear was minimum and I was able to act, think and react without much effort. My comforter was wrapped around me like a doobie. I was rolled up in it. The comforter was twisted on the bottom and the top so much so that when I woke up I could barely move. I looked up and above me there was a very small crack or opening in the comforter in which I could see out. I only had a very small window before I was down the hall and heading out the door into the craft. Immediately I could see the lower leg, ankle and foot of the being pulling me along. The leg was a leg I had seen many times before; I knew exactly who that leg belonged to and that was a gray ET. What crossed my mind at that point was that once this being got me out the sliding door and on board that UFO things would not be in my favor. Anger welled up in me, I pulled all the energy I had, all the damage, past abductions, fear, resentment and I reached my arm up. I shoved my right hand through the crack I grabbed onto the leg and used all my will and power to send an unforgettable message to the ET. The message was that I was done participating on any level to abductions that I was angry and I was going to show this particular ET a lesson. I had felt that during the course of my life the message/s I constantly sent these beings were to leave me alone, I had been clear over and over again. This time I was ready to battle, it was war, game on. I held on to its leg and began to harness all my power, I began to use my hand and fingers to deeply fracture its structure. I could feel my fingers sinking into the tissues and into the bone. I was not going into the UFO just was not going to happen this time or ever again. I sent a telepathic message as I was breaking its leg that I was done and that this was a sign to them, to it that I would not longer be controlled and they could expect a serious fight from here on out and that I had beat the hypnosis.
Then wham bam I am in my bed sitting up, I was released. In the past I could never have fought back, the mind control, hypnosis used is not an easy thing to break. The fear that over takes you as part of the result of the abduction is a state of shock to your mind and body. When they get you into a group setting under the eye of many of them it impossible to do anything against them or run even if you do awaken during the experiments happening to you. It is a worse process to be awaken for any duration of the testing/s, injection/s, surgery/s something that will haunt you forever.
I got up went into the bath room and vomited. I continue to be violently ill it lasted about 5 days. This was a deep clearing from years of swallowing back what had happened to me. It was all the suffering, fear, anger, rage, hopelessness, helplessness that had plagued me all my life over these experiences. After the clearing I felt different, I felt in control of my life, the fear of authority, the fear of domination, the fear of being put upon, forced against my will was gone. I had no idea how deeply this reflected in all aspects of my waking life at the time. However the deeply held lack of security and my deep insecurity that kept me from really living, really being all I could be and thriving began to unravel in layers on mental, emotional, physical and spiritual levels. Tremendous fear, panic continues to come up and release even now!
I have no had another visit from the bad ET”s since and again I am always contemplating about, reflecting on many concepts about this event. It has crossed my mind that maybe their job was to teach me about my will, leading me deeper into shamanism to learn to be fully awake, fully conscious at all times through their trespasses, one can never know sometimes what the truth maybe?
As I finish the process of editing this for posting I am sick to my stomach, the feeling of foreboding washes over me in waves as if there is some underlining nausea of suffering connected to the telling such things. That if I should start to dig in myself and write about truths I have known that there is somehow a punishment coming. I have to be free and for me that means wading into the sea of insanity and finding a voice to speak about it no matter what may come or be.
Around the end of August 2014 on the 3rd day of a trip I was taking which lasted for close to 3 months the good ET’s pulled me out of my body while I was driving into another dimension. What they telepathically explained to me healed me to the depths. I was so relieved to see them, so much love. Stay tune all that is coming in a future writing!
May you find the strength to fight for yourself, fight for your freedom, fight for the ability to control your own reality, fight for your own mind and may this lead to the ultimate freedom of all.
Grow Food, Be Free & Live for a Living!